When you try to please everyone you tend to lose sight of your priority and Whenever you say "yes"when you wanted to say "no" they become like unwanted ticks that keep you up of night. We all have found ourselves awake at night second guessing our decision to help or take on another task just because we are afraid of being deemed mean.
Questions you should ask yourself before saying "yes"
- Do I have the time for this?
- Am I the best person for this?
- Will accepting this request cause me harm?
- Am I willing to sacrifice my priority and goals?
If you find that find that your answer to any of the questions is not agreeable to you; maybe best bet to turn that person's request. Turning down the request should not be done in a manner to is rude or inappropriate.
Simple rules and ways to say no
- No, Thank you- A respectful and gracious answer is more often than not well received.
- I'll get back to you or I'll let you know- Will appease the other party and also give you time to consider if this is something you want to do.
- Do not apologize- We tend to start off with "I'm sorry" when we are telling someone no, and even though it may sound polite it gives the appearance that you are at fault.
- Be nice to yourself- Say "yes"all the time does not make you a nice person, it just means that you will become an easy target.
- Practice saying "no"- we've all heard the term "practice makes perfect"; the more say no the easier it will become, and the less anxiety you will have after saying no.
- Know when yes is the better response- There are times when we will have to put aside our own feelings even when it will inconvenience you because you care about the people you love and you want them to feel loved.
It is sad that as human beings we have limitations, but it is also very freeing to accept these limitations. You have only one chance to share your life, your time, your energy and your love, so don't go saying yes to every little thing. Say no so you can say yes and therefore accepting your limitation and securing your sanity.
Do you practice saying "NO"?